Natural birthing has a bad rep.
When you think of delivering a baby, you automatically think of a scene from the exorcist.
Why it gotta be all that?! How did something that is supposed to be a natural function of our body, turn into being the worst pain of a women's life?! We were literally made to reproduce. How did it get to be such a traumatic experience?! (This is a question that requires a much more in depth answer, which I may do a Facebook Live about.) However, if you look into the history of childbirth, it wasn't always this bad--and doesn't have to be now.
Re-search EVERYTHING
When I first became pregnant, I re-searched EVERYTHING there was to read about child birth. My spirit would not let me believe that delivering my child was going to be the worst pain of my life. I refused to accept that. So.....I read. A lot. And long behold, there are many, MANY ways to deliver a baby, besides the one way presented in most medical settings.
One of the most important things to remember? GRAVITY IS YOUR FRIEND.
Yes, gravity. Think about it. Your baby is coming downwards. Your body positioning makes all the difference in the way your baby will wiggle its way out. There are many positions that aid this process, letting gravity do what it does best. Me personally, I delivered in a squatting position. Baby came out quick and easy. It almost felt as easy as...
No exaggeration, I pushed twice, maybe 3 times for 30 seconds each time. OH! While we are talking about the push--that's another thing that we are taught to do that can really mess us up. We are taught to PUUUUSSSHHHHHHHHHH like our lives depended on it. A lot of us end up tearing, or causing unnecessary stress to the baby that way. We are told to push when the doctor says so, when in reality, we are supposed to push when our BODIES say so. Why don't we listen to our own bodies anymore?! That has got to change.
There is a reason why we are put on a time schedule when we are delivering in medical settings. The longer we stay in the hospital, the more time it takes for another mom ($$$) to get in there. Get em in. Get em out. Get paid. Dollar, dollar bills yall. (Did you know that in NJ, hospitals receive $30,000+ for c-section procedures?) Yes, it's a whole hustle. Google that. You will be shocked.
Not to mention, the setting of some medical facilities add additional stress to the mom and baby. Add in the the stress-filled, over-worked, care takers and you've got yourself a recipe for a stress-filled delivery experience. You know that we as social creatures tend to take on the emotions of people around us, right? And now with this COVID thing....are hospitals even "safe" anymore? More and more women are actually choosing to give birth at home because of the health implications that come with going to medical facilities right now.
Imagine going through labor like this....
Doesn't that just sound DREAMY! This is pretty much how I labored. No, I did not have a face full of make-up, nor a glass of wine and a lusty look on my face. BUT I did have lots of water and hot soup. Hubby and I watched Lady and the Tramp. He ran my baths and gave me massages as needed. We lit incense and prayed all night while we waited for my son's arrival.
People always ask me, "So, you didn't feel any pain?!" Ladies, I would not lie to you. I felt no pain. Of course, I felt cramps during the contractions. Yes, they felt intense towards the end. But it was never excruciating. Never painstaking. Never pain-full.
So much of what we are told to do with our own bodies is predetermined by institutions that we have been told to trust our entire lives. Over the years, we have lost our connection to our own intuition. Our bodies are stronger than we think. MUCH stronger.
We have got to learn how to break generational cycles of physical, mental, and emotional pain. And it can be hard being the first one in a family to do so. The amount of heat I got from my family for having a natural birth would make you want to move all the way across the country (which I ended up actually doing.) I felt a 2007 Britney Spears moment coming on and had to get the $%&^ away!
Every woman has the right to choose which type of birth she wants to have. We have to take the power back and be informed about ALL of our options. Having a natural birth shouldn't be taboo. It shouldn't be something we are shamed for. It can sometimes be a scary thought. That is because for YEARS, we were steered away from how we used to deliver our children. Our birthing process (and our birthing rights) have been colonized. Let's take it back to the basics mommies! You have the power!
If anyone has any questions, or comments about natural birthing, feel free to join our Facebook group, or email us at allmommyissues@gmail.com.
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